The Real Housewives of Atlanta Recap #RHOA

Where do I even begin with this mess?

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Porsha’s dumbness is irritating, Kenya’s insanity is overwhelming, Kandi who was always the cool one is suddenly crying all the time, and Phaedra, the woman who gave birth to a full term child 6 months into her pregnancy is suddenly the voice of reason.
I think Nene needs her sidekick Wig back. Those were the good ole days.

Kenya’s dad comes for a visit and attempts to make up for being a dead beat dad by talking shit and making sure Kenya knows he isn’t proud of anything she’s managed to fake accomplish. He walks around Kenya’s house insulting everything he looks at . He lets her know that he can’t stand hardwood floors, I’m assuming that’s not because he prefers marble, I think we’re talking carpet here.

Yo mamma don't want nothing to do with your psychologically damaged ass. Hell, I'm only here so I can go back to trailer park and brag about being on Tv.

Yo mamma don’t want nothin to do with your psychologically damaged ass. Hell, I’m only here so I can go back to trailer park and brag about being on Tv.

Kenya needs to stop whining about her family shit. How old is she? Get over it woman. I don’t see the big mystery surrounding why her mother doesn’t want anything to do with her. She was an unmarried pregnant teenager at a time when that was something to be ashamed of, not get rich and famous for like today. She didn’t want a child, and still doesn’t. Pretty straight forward. Kenya should just be happy her ass wasn’t aborted.
And it’s not like she grew up in foster care, she had a grandmother who fulfilled the role of mother. How about showing some gratitude Kenya? I imagine her childhood wasn’t difficult, there is no way she grew up to be the delusional entitled narcissist she is today if someone didn’t seriously spoil her when she was young.

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Porsha is another one with a severely over-inflated sense of importance.
You don’t get extra money in a divorce for being a step mom!
I seriously doubt she had any part of raising that child. Maybe she was more of a playmate, I assume it’s hard to parent someone who is on the same intellectual level as you.
Porsha says she stopped working to be a  housewife for Kordell. What career did she give up? Cashier? Not only do I think she’s entitled to exactly $000,000.00, I think she should have to pay Kordell a cut from her Bravo salary. Being his wife is what got her on the show in the first place. She used her husband’s status to get on Tv and then decided she didn’t want to be a housewife anymore because she would rather be a Housewife. I bet she’ll be feeling some regret when Bravo doesn’t renew her contract next season.

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Porsha is confused as to why everyone in her life keeps trying to bring her down by giving her good financial advice. Why can’t they just support her by telling her what she wants to hear? Spending money on things she can’t afford is part of her healing process, and everyone knows that planning for the future in your 30’s isn’t nearly as important as making yourself feel good right now. Girl needs some new friends.

I know kid, she makes me wanna puke too.

(I know kid, she makes me wanna puke too.)

Kandi’s constant tears are getting annoying. Todd is just trying to get as far away from Mamma Joyce as possible and I don’t blame him. Kandi needs to man up and cut the umbilical cord.

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I’m sorry Todd, but mommy says I’m not allowed to do sleep overs with boys.

Mal didn’t just show up to free load for 2 months, she came to get her ass on Tv and hawk some cheap jewelry. Mal needs to learn some manners, and some boundaries. You can’t just show up at someone’s house and announce that you’re staying for 2 months. Not only you can’t announce it, I don’t even think you should ASK it. 2 months is just too long. Especially when the man of the house doesn’t freakin like you. But I guess Peter’s opinion doesn’t count since he’s another freeloader. Cynthia stopped herself from saying this is my house, pay some bills and then maybe you can have a say in what goes on here. But she was thinking it.

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I agree with Nene that Porsha should have told her she was moving to her neighborhood. She could have at least sent a text or something. If I start running into my girlfriend at my local grocery store when I thinks she lives 45 minutes away… I would think it was weird.

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Kenya is fucking nuts. Did you guys see this bitch trying to cross the street? She waits till the only car on the empty street gets close to her, then tries to cross in front of it and gets offended when they don’t slam on the brakes and stop in the middle of the road for her. Those 2.4 seconds she had to wait for the car to pass must have really interfered with her busy day of twirling and making up stories about her imaginary boyfriend.

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Next time on Atlanta, Kenya announces that she’s going to have a child. Not that she’s trying to get pregnant. No, “going to have a child”. Which leads me to believe that she’s planning on kidnapping a toddler. Wouldn’t be surprised.

I watched Blood Sweat and Heels too… but I don’t get it. What is this show supposed to be about? Like a not-rich version of Housewives? I’m just confused by this show.

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