How freakin small is Atlanta? Everyone seems to have slept with (or knows someone who has slept with) everyone else’s husbands and boyfriends. The sexual history on this show is so complicated I’m gonna need a chart soon. It’s always seemed as though the Housewives had a silent rule that marriages and kids are off limits. These bitches are playing dirty now.
It’s Peter and Cynthia’s anniversary and Peter had their friend sing a song that he wrote for her.
It went like this:
“When we met I was alone and broke. Thanks to you I can pay my bills again. I love you.”
It didn’t even rhyme. Like come on Peter, if you need a song written you could have asked Kandi.
Nene finally get’s invited to Porsha’s new home, and she comments about how the previous owners left a Deer head on the wall. They aren’t previous owners Nene, they are the current owners. Not only did they leave the Deer head, they left all that furniture too. I imagine if Porsha bought her own furniture it would probably be pink and plastic, or possibly blow up. The girl spent all her money on rent she can’t even afford wine glasses, she didn’t furnish that house. The only thing she brought with her when she moved in was her clothes and that big ass picture of herself she put over the fireplace.
Kenya’s African Prince oil tycoon businessman is still nowhere to be seen. I feel like she probably fell for one of those 419 email scams. She’s been sending him her Bravo check’s so that he can bribe a corrupt banking official to unfreeze the ₦ 6,546,869,000 he has in his Nigerian bank account and allow him to transfer it into her account. Then he can finally come to America and they can live happily every after.
Kenya has a family dinner and announces that she’s going to have a baby. They’re all like HELL NO YOU BETTER NOT DO THAT. When you’re own family really doesn’t want you to reproduce, that’s a pretty bad sign.
I cannot fully explain the extent to which I don’t care about Kandi’s play. I’d honestly rather watch a Real Housewives of DC reruns than hear her talk about this freakin play.
Lucky for Kandi, Todd is back on board. He just threatened to take that other job to teach her a lesson. Very mature way to handle things. This is gonna be a very happy marriage.
I don’t know what issue Cynthia has with Kandi, but she is bringing her little friend Natalie along to start problems. This girl hates Todd because he cheated on her friend, but that’s not Kandi’s fault. She came on the show being a gossipy bitch so she kinda got what she deserved when Kenya went ahead and informed her that she wasn’t really married to Chris, she was just a common law wife – or at least that what her “husband” tells people behind her back. LOL
Oh the irony of the woman with the fake boyfriend accusing Natalie of having a fake marriage.
I loved the way Kandi handled the situation when they started talking about Todd being an opportunist. That’s how you handle your business and shut bitches up. Kandi is the only one who did a proper job of standing up for her man and showing (or at least pretending) that she believes in him.
I have a feeling Bravo put out a casting call for anyone who has a sexual history of one of the current cast members in order to stir up some drama. Sneaky sneaky Bravo.
The husbands were on WHHL
Todd explains that he dated Natalie’s friend when they were in their 20’s so yeah… he’s “come up” since then because he’s older now. That makes sense. Appollo had a chance to respond to Kenya’s accusation that he was cheating with someone in La and it wasn’t her. He didn’t do a great job of answering that question. His lawyer should have prepared him better. I think he cheated. Andy then asked if any of them have ever met Kenya’s boyfriend. No. Does anyone think he’s real? No.
After that I got bored and stopped watching.
Here are some pictures:
The end.
Hey look I’m #1 on Twitter in my area! Yay!
I joined Sulia. I’m still trying to figure out exactly what it is, but check out my page if you want.
I haven’t watched RHOA in ages and I LOL reading your recap!! The pics and captions, HILARIOUS!!! I’m so glad you’re back to blogging these crazy shows!
Thanks Bea!! 🙂
Great recap and Welcome back!
This show is so good because people actually know each other.
Thank u glad to b back
Rofl, ” Porsha you’re so dumb it’s painful”. Great line
Awesome!! So funny and I love the photo telling montage!! Thanks for the chuckles!!
😀