Yolanda’s BS Bravo Blog

(Yolanda’s blog was long and annoying. So I left some paragraphs out.)

Nobody Planned an Attack on Lisa

(except you)

Yolanda H. Foster

Yolanda shares her intentions in talking to Lisa on the beach and but shares why she wishes Lisa had stayed and talked things out.

Posted by Yolanda H. Foster on Feb 24

Hearing the news about the death of Joyce’s father was heart breaking for me. Having lost my own father, I know it’s one of the most devastating losses to endure in life. We were all a little hesitant to go on the trip to PR, but Joyce was adamant to stick to the plan and felt her father would have wanted it that way. (I doubt her father would have cared about any of you women or your vacation) I personally would have pulled out and not traveled with a group of people I just met (Is that a dig?) , but, to be fair, I do know that everyone deals with grief differently. (Sounds like a dig) So I respect her choice and tried to be a source of comfort the best I could. (By starting fights and drama)

When I watch this episode, it seems like there was some master plan against Lisa going on, which is absolutely not what happened. (But it is what happened, you sat and discussed it with Brandi the night before…)


I initiated a conversation with Lisa on the beach with the intent to discuss my personal issues regarding her not showing up for very important things in my life. (Painting in the garden. Seriously.) I was very hurt and disappointed by that, so I needed to share that with her so that we could put things behind us. (But instead you talked about Brandi and Kyle and things that had nothing to do with you) Unfortunately our conversation did not get that far. When Brandi and Kyle joined into the conversation it then made Lisa feel like we were attacking her — even though they were three unrelated issues. (So 3 against 1 isn’t an attack as long as each person as a separate issue, and not the same one. Another good one from the pages of Friendship According To Yolanda.)

It’s hard to see everyone’s point-of-view but we must share for the sake of moving on. Kyle has a five-year relationship with Lisa with many unresolved issues. (That are none of your business) The magazine was only a small part of that. Brandi and Lisa were best friends way before I joined the group, (I’m not sure it’s really been that long) which I don’t know anything about, but I did witness the overnight change in their friendship. I know Lisa saw the tabloid at Brandi’s house but I did not see her put the tabloid in the suitcase. . . (Backing off from the Lisa takedown now?)

This whole conversation has gone off topic for me personally. I can only speak for myself when I say that my issues with Lisa over the past year have nothing to do with anyone in this group. (No, it’s all about a painting party) I thought Lisa was my friend, and I believe my friendships with women to be about sharing! Some of you speak about jealousy, but trust me it is not part of this equation at all. (That’s the only part of the equation) There is nothing that Lisa is or has that I want. (Hahaha!!!!) I cheer for her successes and always compliment her greatness (did you tweet and vote for her on Dancing With The Stars?) — but that does not mean that I don’t have an opinion. (You have a lot of opinions that you should seriously be keeping to yourself) 

I just needed her to acknowledge the lack of participation in our friendship and not brush me off. Unfortunately, you do not get to see the conversation Lisa and I had when we got off the bus in Puerto Rico before sitting down at the restaurant for dinner. She heard me out and promised she would make a better effort to participate in our friendship, which was all I personally needed to hear from her. (You just want a pat on the head and a morning phone call. I get it.)

Kyle’s question at the dinner table to Lisa and Brandi was fair and she deserved an honest answer.

If Ken had given me the opportunity to speak at the table before lumping me in with the three other women and before he called me “stupid,” (that was funny) I would have said that I saw the magazine in question at Brandi’s house — but I never saw Lisa put it in the suitcase. (Totally not backing Brandi anymore. Love the loyalty here Yo.) Ken did not want Kim to speak for Brandi, but he spoke for Lisa even though the truth is that neither one was there. (Are you jealous that you don’t have a man to speak for you?)

Obviously Kim’s response to Ken was rude, but again she was reacting to a lot of unresolved issues that have never been acknowledged. (You women seriously need something important to happen in your lives…) Saying that she was drinking or on something is alluding to the fact that she was not sober, which is far from the truth. (Kim has never once looked sober as far as I’ve seen in 4 seasons)

We ended up having a fun time with lots of laughs without drama. (Once Lisa left and you got to play Queen Bee of the group) At the end of the day, we all want to get along (as long as everyone does what you want to do) and create new memories together just like everyone else.

Please share your thoughts and opinions, but do remember that you are not judging a contest but rather real human beings (what percentage of you is still real?) with real(ly ridiculous) feelings (over petty issues). These 45-minutes do not define who we are as people but rather show a snippet of our imperfection under the microscope that we own just like every one else. (What have you owned? Aren’t you still blaming the “hearts” on your Lyme disease?)

Until next week. . .

Much love,




  1. I found it very interesting that Mohammed refused to put down Lisa when Yolo tried to get him to do so, when they were planning Gigi’s party. He has also been Tweeting his support of Lisa. Yolo wants to be Queen, and she can’t if Lisa is there. So, she’ll take Brandi, Kyle and Kim over to her side. Next week it looks like Carlton is on Lisa’s side (no prize) and Joyce will be on the opposite side from Brandi.

    1. Mohammed and Lisa are real friends from before the show. Yolanda is just the ex wife of Lisa’s friend that she see’s at social events sometimes.
      I don’t think Yolanda and Mohammed’s relationship is as great as Yolanda wants us to believe it is. I think it’s a lot of her swallowing her jealousy and trying to insert herself in any way possible by throwing parties at his house and being his interior decorator. I don’t think Yolanda was really a part of his social circles after the divorce.
      I think she viewed joining Housewives as a chance to get in with the “cool kids”
      So now she’s all up Lisa’s ass and expecting that they would be BFF’s through the ex husband connection. But really they’ve never been anything more than social friends and I don’t think Lisa wants to be anything more than that. But Lisa is too polite to be like “Listen bitch, I don’t know you that well… chill the fuck out”

    2. This is exactly how I see it too. It must be aggravating for Y that Moh is not on her side publicly even a little bit, which is another reason for hating Lisa. I think things were off with Lisa even before the painting party. I think she was waiting for Lisa to do something so that she could just jump on it and go.in fact she says she always cheers for her successes, and in my memory she’s usually bashing Lisa behind her back as well in talking heads from the start of the season. This def stems from the fact Moh probably has more respect for Lisa than Yo and she knows it.

  2. Where have you been all of my RH loving life?! Nevermind, I found you now. Thank you for putting all the sarcastic comments running around in my head onto “paper” in a delightful fashion.

    1. I haven’t been watching and didn’t hear they were selling. Absolutely smells suspicious after all the “drawing” she did. How long have they lived there anyway?

      awww miss PYHU, how I love your recaps. Better than mochi!

  3. It’s appropriate that Yolanda titled her blog “Nobody Planned an Attack on Lisa”, since they are, indeed, a group of nobodies.

  4. Yolanda is so full of it an the more I see her an the more she talks it’s obvious that Yolanda doesn’t say the truth then she always backpedaling what she saids after the fact an I feel she might be jealous of Lisa .

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