Dear @BravoTV, I have some shit to say about #RHOBH

Dear Bravo,

You clearly having a sinking ship on your hands, this boat is taking on water and is going down, what you need to do is start throwing dead weight overboard, and fast.

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I think we can all agree that Carlton needs to be the first to go. I know she doesn’t weigh much, but all that negative energy she carries around with her weighs a ton and you gotta get rid of it.
Plus she’s too trashy for Beverly Hills. If someone at Bravo really wants to keep her around for some reason, send her to New Jersey and let her pick up where Danielle left off with the stripper poles and scaring the other women with her weirdness. I’m sure there is a book or a porno out there somewhere.

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Joyce… just give her a little shove over the side when no one’s looking. No one will even notice her absence, I swear.

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Yolanda’s BS Bravo Blog

(Yolanda’s blog was long and annoying. So I left some paragraphs out.)

Nobody Planned an Attack on Lisa

(except you)

Yolanda H. Foster

Yolanda shares her intentions in talking to Lisa on the beach and but shares why she wishes Lisa had stayed and talked things out.

Posted by Yolanda H. Foster on Feb 24

Hearing the news about the death of Joyce’s father was heart breaking for me. Having lost my own father, I know it’s one of the most devastating losses to endure in life. We were all a little hesitant to go on the trip to PR, but Joyce was adamant to stick to the plan and felt her father would have wanted it that way. (I doubt her father would have cared about any of you women or your vacation) I personally would have pulled out and not traveled with a group of people I just met (Is that a dig?) , but, to be fair, I do know that everyone deals with grief differently. (Sounds like a dig) So I respect her choice and tried to be a source of comfort the best I could. (By starting fights and drama)

When I watch this episode, it seems like there was some master plan against Lisa going on, which is absolutely not what happened. (But it is what happened, you sat and discussed it with Brandi the night before…)

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Brandi’s BS Bravo Blog

Brandi: My Issues With Lisa Come From a Place of Hurt

Brandi Glanville

Brandi explains why Lisa cozying up to Kyle hurt her and what she’s learned watching ‘Vanderpump Rules.’

Posted by Brandi Glanville on Feb 24667

I think it is very clear that the issues I have with Lisa come from a place of hurt because I cared so much about her. (BS. You’re just trying to do damage control) I wasn’t having a great year this year because of some health issues (it’s called being drunk) and my father and I not talking (because you called him a drug dealer in your book), so I really needed my friends. During this time Lisa distanced herself from me (didn’t you tell her to back off and stop smothering you?) and started cozying back up to Kyle (they threw one party together and you’re all losing your minds over it) because I wasn’t coming off so well. (Do you have a girl crush on Lisa?)

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Lisa Vanderpump on Dirty Pop with Lance Bass

I heard this interview with Lance and Lisa while I was in the car. I tried to remember as much of it as possible, but don’t quote me!

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About Puerto Rico, Lisa says that the whole thing with the ladies went too far. She thinks Brandi planned it from the beginning and she doesn’t think they could ever be friends again.

Lance said it’s clear that the other women are just jealous and that’s what this drama is all about. (I agree)

Lisa agreed too, she said it’s also about Vanderpump Rules and Dancing with the Stars. She said when she got those two shows, that’s when the women all started acting differently towards her. She said the women never voted or tweeted for her during Dancing with the Stars and that spoke volumes to her. She said it’s not the noise from your enemies but the silence from your friends. Ohhhh, how profound.

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The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Bitching on the Beach

We’re going to Puerto Rico! Yay! The worst (and by worst, I mean best) shit always happens on the vacations. And Carlton isn’t invited! Amazing.

Kim finally decided to show up for something.
No Kim, you’re going on vacation not sneaking out of rehab, you don’t have to be inside the suitcase this time.

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There was one other person on the show who also sat inside the suitcase.

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Joyce’s dad died, but she’s not going to let that interfere with her party. So she wants everyone to ignore the death and have a great time. All the women say “everybody deals with grief differently” about Joyce, but what they really mean is “Joyce doesn’t seem to care too much that her dad is dead.”

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They arrive at the hotel and Lisa screams and pulls her hair out, and then faints when she see’s the peasants quarters they’ve placed her in.

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Ken, can you fly Rosio down here please, I don’t know where that toilet seat has been, and these sheets are making me itch.

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Crafts I Made This Week – Wine Glasses, Coffee Cups, and Bird Feeders

 

Painting Coffee Cups with Martha Stewart Paints 

This is my morning coffee cup. That scribble on the bottom used to be a really pretty sun…. until I swallowed half of it with my morning coffee.
Warning (this should have been included on the bottle): Don’t paint the inside of your cups.
On the bright side, I’m still alive so I guess the paint isn’t toxic.

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Carlton’s BS Bravo Blog #RHOBH

Carlton: I Didn’t Want Kyle’s Ring

(It wasn’t a ring!! It’s a crown!)

Carlton Gebbia

Carlton tries to explain the oddity around Kyle’s peace offering — and how Lisa had nothing to do with her refusal.

I love Objets d’Art & Spirit. It is a favorite place of mine to visit when I feel like I’m in need of a little positive, protective something. I was first introduced to it by an amazing lady Kathleen who I met years ago in Kona, Hawaii. It’s one of those places that’s filled with beautiful magical energy (what the fuck is magical energy? Are magical things happening there? Oh right, they’re getting people to pay $50 for candles that cost 99cents. There is definitely retail magic happening there) as are the people that work there. I’ve always used candles, (really, that’s so amazing and unique of you) but these are truly on another level. (How? Are they hand made from the ear wax of fairies or something? We need explanations here.) (It was a pleasure for me to share this treasured place with Yolanda as I knew she would appreciate its spiritual value. Aside from these candles they have wonderful crystals, which I knew Yolanda would like, since she too has crystals in her own home. (Since crystals are a gift from the earth I wonder how the earth feels about the store making a profit on these free gifts.)

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